Best Thing I Never Had

"You turned out to be the best thing I never had
And I'm gon' always be the best thing you never had" - Beyonce Knowles



Ten years ago, I was applying for a job with a big company. I was one of three candidates who was seriously considered for this position. The job was that of a college recruiter. My territory would have covered Washington, D.C. and the surrounding areas - Virginia and Maryland. During the selection, I was thinking this would the ultimate position in a location I love. Needless to say, I did not get the position. I was crushed and very disappointed. This would have been perfect for me.

A few months after getting my rejection notice, 9-11 happened. Tragedy, shock and anger pervaded our nation. In the midst of all these emotions, our economy was thrown into a tailspin. Corporate impropriety came to the surface as reports of companies reporting false earnings became frequent.   One major corporation - let's just say one that specialized in energy - made headlines for some very bad behavior. To add, all companies associated with this major corporation were also implicated. Remember that big company I mentioned in the first paragraph? Yep, they were one of those companies that perpetuated this major corporation's misdeeds. As a result, the big company - the one I wanted to work for so badly-  was knee deep in obstruction of justice charges and was subsequently dissolved.

Clearly, I was grateful for not getting what I wanted. Life has a way of giving me what I need. I admit wishing I had a different job or hoping that someone I care for would fall in love with me. Yet, beyond all the wishing, there is only one constant: the present. This moment. Now is where my life can be truly lived. Living in the present is such a challenge.  It is so easy to pine after the dream job or the ex that has moved on with life.

I have learned that instead of asking 'why am I here right now', I should instead wonder 'what is this moment trying to teach me?' In my current position, I get to make connections with so many people, impart knowledge and learn about me in the process. The person I wish would fall in love with me is in my life as a dear friend, who is teaching me to love myself more every day.  This moment is also teaching me not to limit myself in love and in my dreams; that I need to have the courage to take the next step.